My Approach
I am an Humanistic Integrative Counsellor. This means I acknowledge that each of us have our own unique personality and unique perspective of the world.(humanistic). I have trained in several modalities of counselling and use this to allow me to attune sessions to each individual client.(Integrative) This means our sessions will be as unique as you are yourself.
I can talk here about how I use my compassion, empathy, mindfulness and a host of other things. But feel it might be more helpful to outline what sessions with me might look like.
In early sessions we might cover a lot of ground work. One minute talking about the present and the next relating it to a past event or person, which reminds you why you took a certain path in life. These sessions can feel very full, without particular focus. But they are so very important in helping us make sense of realizations in later sessions. Imagine how you might tip the contents of a jigsaw onto the floor. Breaking up pieces that are stuck together,up the pieces grouping them together into coulours, or scenes to help rebuild the picture.
If challenging emotions are around I will hold them with you offering compassion and empathy. You will start to experience emotion without becoming overwhelmed and become more confident in soothing your emotions outside of our hour. Where depression and anxiety are making life a challenge I will offer techniques and ideas that help alleviate your expriences of these.
You soon notice sessions starting to become more focused on certain areas as we come into the middling of the counselling process. I invite you to become more curious of your story. Curiosity is of so much more value than judgement. During this time you will start to experience 'aha' moments. Recognising certain patterns in your life. These recognitions are what bring about lasting change. Be assured I am right there with you responding to these moments with empathy, compassion. I might even dare to invite you to explore your realizations further, firmimg up your understandin of them. That jigsaw I talkes about -
this is working out what is sea and what is sky. They look similar, but so very different.
Recognising the end of the counselling process is on the horizon can be daunting. For some it is clean cut and for others it takes a little longer as new habits and thought patterns are both strengthened and reinforced. As always there is no rush in your own time. Endings are important, and again something we can be curious about and give attention to as we decide how and when we end our sessions together.
When you do leave, know, that it will be with a new perspective and a whole new set of coping stratagies for life. Whilst we can't change what life throws at us, we can change how we respond.
The Big Three
most often present in sessions
Anxiety
Anxiety is a perfectly normal response to immediate danger or threat, so is something we really don't want to live without.
However if you start to see or imagine danger or threat everywhere, you are suffering with anxiety disorder. The most common being GAD (generalised anxiety disorder). Symptoms of this are a general feeling of nervousness or unease, disturbed sleep, overthinking or worrying and sometimes panic attacks. It can be most debilitating. I always liken it to a fear that holds you captive in the name of protection. I will offer some stratergies to help calm the symptoms as together we look at possible underlying reasons for the anxiety.
Depression
Depression can be a normal response to certain life events, such as relationship breakdown, grief, the loss of a job or financial concerns. This will be experienced briefly with a sense of it fading in and out of your awareness.
When dression hangs around for weeks it is an illness on it's own. You may experience a mild depression, being able to work, socialise and generally go about daily living, but without energy or enthusiasm. Moderate depression may see you start to loose your appetite, feeling tired more often and avoid socialising. Severe depression will find you struggling to get up or fully function on a day to day basis. If this is the case, I would urge you to seek help from myself, other professional or/and your GP.
Depression needs to be met with compassion, courage and honesty. Trust me, there a light can be found in thae darkest of places.
Trauma
Trauma is a major cause of mental health conditions. Psychological trauma is the result of any experience that leaves us in a state of fear, abandonment, trapped, ashamed, humiliated or powerless. And can be as a one off incident or many over a long period of time.
Trauma can stay with us for years. This can be confusing when the trauma was experienced as a small child and therefore hard to make sense of as an adult arriving for counselling.
It isn't necessary to revisit truama to heel from it. (Although some people feel the need to and that is perfectly ok). When working with trauma my intent is to relieve any suffering not re experience it. I help clients to recognise and become confident in regulating the symptoms of trauma, to allow healing to take place.